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not really. however I know I can't get on the path of recovery on my own. so in that way I am looking forward to working steps because they will lead me on right path to full recovery. i'm fearful of confronting my inner demons.
inner healing and a healthier and strong relationship with myself and in time healing of my relationships.
I make some progress and stop thinking I'm finished. and stop doing the steps and things necessary to start on the path of recovery.
relationships falling apart
I don't have the courage or strength to confront my inner demons
I need routine and habits. for the steps to work for me I need to do them daily. to make that happen i need to block off time in my schedule to work the steps and attend meetings etc
absolutely! I have been struggling with my addiction my entire life. and struggling alone. since sharing it with some people and my spouse recently I no longer have to go alone. i've accepted I can't go or do it alone. or depend of someone else to do the work for me. only with God's help can i do this.
I'm not going alone. I willing to ask for and seek out help and support from loved ones, friends, therapist, and a support community
old habits and beliefs. the old me. the way I have done things for my entire life. my anger, resentment, my fear of rejection. my pride
Yes and no. Yes in the sense that I still have lots of hope that working the steps in a real and thorough way will allow god to bless me with a spiritual experience and real recovery. No in the sense that I’m doubtful about this particular method of working the steps
I hope that I am able to connect with God and that he is able to give me the spiritual awakening he wants to bless me with
It won’t work, either because I don’t do my part sufficiently or because this particular approach doesn’t include all of the crucial things
I do think that a Daily approach to working the steps is the right way to go for me—I’m easily overwhelmed by the idea a large amount of work, but I know from experience that I can handle a little bit of work one day at a time
Yes. I’m completely exasperated by my recent returns to using pornography and even masturbating. I feel like I’m ready to face my fears of what my new life will be like without any pornography or even action towards lust in it.
I have a solid base this time of doing my dailies each day, so I’m very hopeful that adding a systematic bite sized approach to working the steps to that structure will allow me to find success in doing my part.
I am ready to leave behind the safety and security of what I already know, and all of my protections from potentially being given too much hard work to do without enough breaks, and just embrace whatever god has for me.
I am looking forward to working the steps to remain firmly in recovery, and to have an in-person support group.
That I will get closer to God and have His support.
That I won't feel comfortable with the group.
I think it'll work by keeping my problem front and center so it can be ministered to.
I know I can't manage it on my own. I've seen enough horror stories on trying to go it alone, so the sooner I get started the better.
Long term consistency.
Shame, deceit, cold heartedness.
Yes, as I feel it will greatly help recovery
I will give up my addiction
I might not like living without my addiction.
I think working the steps daily, allows me to be focused on my addiction.
I am. I'm tired of the addiction and the havoc it has reigned on my life.
This is my first time trying so I envision success!!!
The lying. That was one of the worst things I had in my life.
I am. I have worked them many times and when I work the steps freedom and peace are the rewards.
I become the person I see in others who have worked the steps and are working them.
I am afraid of two things. First, I'll work the steps see progress and convince myself that I don't need to work them as often or at all. Second, I'll work the steps and get prideful and stop working the steps. They are very similar but both have played out in my addiction brain.
I feel like working the steps will work for a time. But then I will come to believe I don't need to at a certain point.
Tonight I believe I can answer this question with a strong YES! However, this desire in me fades and like the children of Moses who tried to gather manna for several days, I will try and cram in my recovery work. I need daily strength from God. I can do it with his help!
I don't know! the only thing I could think of was to be accountable to my accountability partner everyday. I want it to be different this time so I'm going to check in with someone who will know weather I'm doing this or not.
Time. I am willing to give up time to watch TV, read a book, do things for myself, etc.
I want to build the tools and habits that will lead to long-term recovery. I am sick and tired of being on the addiction treadmill. I believe that this work will be an important element of my recovery process.
That I begin to discover my true self underneath the veneer that I have built over the course of my life. I get to see the glimpses of myself but I don't show that to others. I am hopeful that this process will bring me to the forefront in life.
I am afraid of being discovered by my children and that they will not be able to forgive me for all of my shortcomings. I know that love me but I also know they have an image of me that isn't accurate in that I am the dad who does almost everything well. This will be a shock to each of them.
I want to make this a "daily practice" so that I continue to focus on the things that matter most in life. I have developed habits that have put me off course for large chunks of time. Now I want to focus on doing things that are both productive and helpful to my development as a human being.
I am in a different place than I have ever been before. I am, for the first time, completely committed to putting my addiction behind me. I have come to realize that I cannot do this without God's assistance. I have already experienced some beautiful advances in my recovery when I have surrendered to God and submitted to His will instead of trying to force my will. This have been a difficult theme throughout my life but now I get to do it for all of the right reasons. It is like returning home to my God or Heavenly Father. Or as Nephi says in the BofM, My Christ!
I am approaching my recover on my terms. I have submitting to the process and I am committed to involving God as a partner in this process. Those are significant differences than where I have been in the past.
I am leaving behind my selfish behaviors wherein I justified my actions. I am willing to be fully authentic in showing up in this process. I WANT to do this!
Yes, because I feel like I've talked about 12 step for so long but only ever dabbled in real step work. I never had a solid sponsor and everyone I talked to never really seemed to put it to me straight with step work and actually putting things on the table.
I become more and more the man that I am called to be and become more connected with myself, God and others.
That I could fail and never truly recover
Because I need consistency and parameters to measure myself by or I'm always just adjusting and using damage control in my recovery when I need to react.
Yes, because I see I am powerless and do not want to live a life that is without God. I wish to belong to God and give myself over to him.
My life will actually be one day at a time as I develop a new way of life through the step work that I do, little by little. Before I made daily efforts of acting out, whether they were in my mind or external acting out. I got there by going back to that place again and again until I had made thousands of steps down that path. The same daily inch by inch with the step work can get me out of that through surrendering.
Believing that I already have all the answers. Trying to fix others. Trying to do everything at once. Making excuses and throwing away opportunities that I know I should take.
Very much so. This program is helping to rewire my brain, think and react differently. Trusting and looking to God are things I need too practice doing and these steps will get me to that point, I really believe.
Personal growth. I love that the steps are steps of action and help me to do and practice doing things that will help me be more mindful and reflective in my daily life. Taking it one day at a time and being ok with that. I want to be more confident with myself and my relationship with my higher power. I want to learn how to be more mindful and less shameful about my addiction.
That I will work the steps but nothing will change. That I will have the same character defects and pain management cycles. That it will feel like homework.
It works when you work it. That is my hope. I want to work on taking my recovery one day at a time, and stop looking so far ahead, wishing I had more sobriety.
I hope so. It has been two years since I fully disclosed my addiction to my wife and it has been a roller coaster of denial and discovery. I have been stubborn and resistant to some changes and programs. I'm just beginning to realize that there is more I need to change than just my porn addiction. I have many character defects that I need to further understand and address.
I better realize the work that it will take. I am more open and excited about attending my 12 step group each week.
Old patterns of pain management. Anger, impatience, pride, insecurities, fear. I struggle with laziness as well, that will be hard to overcome but I want to try,
I am looking forward to working the steps because I've been acquainted with them for over 20 years and have made attempts to work them, but I haven't really known how, and even the time I tried working with a sponsor in SAA wasn't successful. I didn't know the right way to work them, especially step 4 which I never managed to complete. I needed a guidance and a framework and that's what this seems to offer.
We always read and hear that the 12 steps work if you work them. I hope with this guidance I will be able to progress through the steps and begin to experience the realization of the Promises in my life.
I worry that it won't make a difference or that I will begin with enthusiasm but then my efforts will gradually peter out as they so often do in many areas of my life.
Having a format to work the steps on a day to day basis is exactly what I need. I am thankful for this specific guidance. I'm hopeful that it will prove to be an effective tool in my recovery from powerlessness and unmanageability.
Is anyone ever really 100% ready to let go of their trusted coping mechanisms? Isn't there a part in all of us that would like to somehow keep a little of it, as an option, just in case, or to figure out a way to have things both ways? Having said that, unmanageability has increased greatly in my life, and as a result pain has increased greatly as well. For decades I thought I managed to keep my life fairly manageable, but now things are finally coming to a head. If I don't really begin to truly stay clean, then I'm likely to lose my 25 year second marriage, incur disastrous financial results, lose the house in the midst of an insane housing market, and more. Consequences won't get me clean or keep my clean but they can motivate me to change.
For one, having a format to work a daily program.
For another, having a group of men with real sobriety, rather than the lackluster local ARP meeting with me and the moderator and maybe one other guy, and nobody with real recovery, and nobody to offer sponsorship.
Third, adding in therapy.
It's difficult to contemplate, but I will have to leave behind the wonderful feelings that I experience when viewing images of beautiful women. My marriage is a fairly sexless one, around monthly, and even then with no enthusiasm on my spouse's part. She is hostile towards sexuality and likely to remain so. If I have to lay my sexual feelings and hopes for sexual fulfilment on the altar to get clean and stay clean, then so be it. I will no longer be able to take care of those needs and feelings myself.
I am because I’m tired of living in misery. But at the same time I am afraid to give up my addiction. I am afraid of the feelings that go along with sobriety.
I hope that I stop acting out. I hope that I can reclaim my life.
That I don’t ever get better and I continue to dig myself deeper into isolation and fear.
I feel like at the point of life I’m in right now I can only handle small daily bite sized chunks. Otherwise I will get overwhelmed and probably give up.
I be am at this moment. I am out of control and my life is 100% unmanageable. I’m on the verge of losing my marriage and I can’t focus on work. I can’t connect with my kids and life just sucks right now.
I need guidance in how to work the steps. I need structure. I am really hoping this gives me the insight and help I need to get through the steps.
Whatever God reveals for me to leave behind.
Yes! I want to get better, not just get sober.
Heal relationships and live happy, joyous, and free.
I might get stuck or overwhelmed.
daily honesty and focus on healing behaviors
Absolutely! Why not now?
I'm not alone.
unfiltered access to the Internet, youtube, browser on phone, social media, triggering media, anger and resentment
I am looking forward to working the steps because it is part of my path to healing from the trauma i have experienced from childhood. I am hoping to experience a spiritual awakening to the step work to have this be of life long benefit.
I seek to gain a better understanding of the steps so I can better apply the steps in my daily life. I want to transform my life and become a changed person. I seek to be a better husband and father. I seek to mend the trauma I have inflicted on others.
I fear I will do the work but not feel the change in my life. I have studied the steps for the last two a a half years. I feel my understanding has been superficial and familiar at a very high level. I also fear failure
Working the steps day to day sets the tone for my day and positions me for a day of commitment and sobriety. Recovery and healing are a priority for me and I am committed to make the time to do daily step work.
I am ready to let go of my addiction. In all honesty I have temptation to revert back to my addiction but I have fought these back for the last five plus months. My spirit is willing but my flesh is weak. I plead in daily prayer for help and support through faith in Jesus Christ. Some days are better than others but I am determined to persevere.
It has taken so much effort and hard work to achieve the sobriety that I now have. I want to nurture it and strengthen it so I do not give it up. I am done collecting Hope Chips and now only want to earn milestone chips.
I am firmly convinced that I will leave behind everything to achieve sobriety and try to regain the trust of my wife.
I am excited to look at the steps and to make progress. I am a little nervous because I have tried other programs with no success.
I hope that I can become an honest and authentic person. I hope that I will be able to heal and get free from the cloudiness of addictions.
I will waste a month of time and not make the changes necessary leading to me failing and not improving.
It is easy for me to justify not working on things because I get busy. I do not have a great schedule or routine but work early hours and do not sleep well at night.
I feel like I say I am. I always say I want to change but I have never changed. It is hard because I am willing but I do not know if it will work.
I will be authentic and honest. I will put in the work and
I am willing to leave addictions in the dust. I am willing to leave pride. I am willing to leave saving face. I am willing to leave people pleasing behind.
Yes. I know that working the steps is a spiritual process that helps me meet my goals.
I have connection with God, Christi, myself, and others
I do have concerns that I won't work the steps as well being on line.
I've worked the steps daily for years. They work for me.
That is a daily process. I've demonstrated through faithfully working the steps that I will do the work.
Maybe more writing a reflections through this process.
Fear and the natural man.
Yes I am looking forward to working the steps. I have been working on and fighting my addiction for many years, and am glad that there have been developments in the ways in which we do it.
I hope for a gradual increase in my sobriety lengths as I gain understanding of my self and my understanding of relying on the Savior.
That nothing might change.
I have trouble developing strong habits. I was not even able to do morning study for the entire month of December. I am subject to changing schedules and a lack of desire to do 'work' first thing in the morning, but I also know that if I dont do this first thing that it will get lost and overlooked in my day.
I certainly hope so. I feel that I am. I have always been trying to do recover, but haven't always known how. I have been through various therapy groups, sessions etc as well as the LDS ARP groups, however I felt that they all were insufficient and not significantly helpful. I have found more help and support working with Craig than I ever have before. Previously I always felt it was a battle I fought on my own. Kellie wanted to help, but really was just being hurt by her deep involvement in my issues and my relapses. I have seen my marriage deteriorate in the last several years, and I want so badly to reverse this damage and have the love I once had from my wife.
I have a more constructed, more organized effort. I have a better support system that does not rely on putting all my burden and pain on Kellie.
I hope that I am willing to leave behind the filth that invades my life. I want to leave behind the duality that my mind and personality seems to portray. I want to put my 'addict mind' in a box to rot. I dont want it to trouble me and sneak up on me any longer. I want my thoughts and my desires to be my own, not his.
Yes. I’m ready to make a lasting change to free myself from addiction.
I hope that I can move my energy to productivity and have the best relationship with God and my wife possible.
I’m not afraid - I’m full of faith.
I know it’s a daily commitment and through small daily commitments and steps, lasting change can happen.
Yes! I know only God can take my burden and pain. I know God has the power to do so.
My partnership with God.
I’m willing to leave behind the old me and step into the new person God wants me to be.
Yes, Because this addiction has taken over my life and has hurt many people in the process.
I hope I can forgive myself, and be the person I know I can be.
That this addiction will never leave me.
I have never tried this before and hoping for a good result.
Not sure, I have tried a lot of things.
Yes and no. It's something I'm wanting to do to help my wife feel safe but I'm also tired of recovery work. I want to heal for myself as well so I will look for any tools and try anything I can.
I hope to have better tools to help me recover and also understand what my addiction does to me on a day to day basis. How does it control my actions? How can I take that control back? I also hope to connect better with my wife and have the strength to work with my children to heal our relationship.
Nothing. I'm afraid it will feel as if nothing has happened. That there will be just another step to take to recover trust with my spouse. and then another and another. That I won't feel closer to control and I'll just feel like it was a waste.
They will work. They will help me understand myself and also reflect on the addiction, the pain it's caused myself and my family.
YES! I've been ready but I've lacked tools, understanding and discipline. I'm looking forward to this step work to give me more accountability.
Well this is the first real step work I've done but I think the journaling and getting my thoughts down on screen will really help me understand the process and feel more accountable to the work I need to do.
Video games that take up too much time. Bottling up feelings and not expressing the things that are running through my mind. other time wasters so I have the time to really work this program.
I'm looking forward to using this online course to work the steps because I get kind of lost and lose focus when I work them on my own.
I hope there is a "thoroughness" to completing the steps instead of me skimming through them like I usually do.
If history repeats itself, I may lose focus and lose interest.
I thinking doing the steps everyday will keep it fresh in my mind and keep me focused on the goal of step 12 (to share with and help others).
I am so ready. I've never been readier. Over the last 3 months, I have been shown a whole new world of resources for recovery, including this program. I attended the IOP at Lifestar and attended boot camp. I have truly been blessed.
I have new eyes. I have a new trajectory. I have new all inclusive resources. I have newly received confidence. I just can't get complacent and let my guard down like a usually do. I have to be reminded that this is a war with the enemy and neither of us want to lose. That's why I think working this program daily is going to so helpful. It will keep me on my toes.
Social media. Mindless web surfing.
No. It feels like drudgery. It's not something that I want to do but feel I need to.
I hope my attitude changes and that I become captivated by doing the work.
I'm not afraid of anything happening in particular.
As I give myself over to the program I believe it will benefit me. I've seen what it has done for others.
Yes. I've been sober for 11 months and it's time to get serious.
This is the first time working the steps.
I leave behind all my triggers, people, and behaviors.
I dont know what to expect and yet I am hopeful. I am looking forward to many things. From self worth discovery to learning how I can heal.
I hope to understand me more. Maybe I will find love in my self and in someone else agian.
I am afraid I will fall and fail. that I will not complete this 12 step. I feel there is so much to do and so much to learn and I am afraid.
I dont know how to answer this question as I dont know what to expect or how it starts. Agian I am hopeful.
I hope to my higher power that I am ready and able. and why now? well because it takes a driving force.... I found my driving force...
EFFORT.. thats the difference. a desire to ACTUALLY change.
Yes, to find so order
I learn to recognize the triggers
By small and simple things, great things can happen
Yes, I have been trying it on my own and I know I need help
All that is a hinder
Yes. Because I know that it will direct my path to re-connect with God, myself, and my wife.
That I will understand my true identity and long-term success as a husband & father.
That I will fail.
I feel that working the Steps on a day-to-day basis keeps me mindful and aware of the moment. Not getting too far off into the future or downtrodden from the past. This will be a lifelong pursuit.
Yes. I am ready. I am ready because I know that the pain and hurt that I feel from disappointing my Heavenly Father, myself, and my wife and kids is overwhelming. I know that the only way to safety and peace is to turn my life over to God.
Turning my life over to God. Realizing that only He has the power and authority to help me and to direct my paths.
Lust. Dishonesty. Feeling bad about myself. Looking forward to seeing sin as "abhorreth" living a "new normal" with my wife...making the best out of a terribly painful situation and hoping to be stronger than ever in my marriage and relationship with Christ.
I am looking forward a little, The reason I feel only a little is due to one more thing I have to do.
I can remember and renew the changes in my life. The changes I want to have permanently.
I will give up and not follow through.
The small little things that I do are the ones that actually help make the change for me. A life long change.!!
Yes!!! I have been turning my life over to the Lord the last year and that has been my biggest source of help and strength.
The difference is that I have never actually followed through with going through all the steps.
I'm going to follow through to the end.
My addiction, my need for acceptance.
I believe I am. I am because I feel like I'm at rock bottom. I've caused myself agony tome and again. I have damaged my wife's heart. I feel so miserable right now.
I hope I can man up and be accountable. I hope I finally achieve some sobriety.
I'm afraid I'll forget my resolve, lose my commitment, fall back into old habits, and lose my family.
I feel it will work because I need it to. I need it. I hope the constant dedication it will take will help me to remember.
I am ready. Finally. I'm at rock bottom, I've been at rock bottom so many times already, but this really is it. I can't allow myself to have to tell my daughters that my addiction caused our family to split up.
This time I will be consistent. At all costs. I will not allow a single day to pass without meeting all of my goals. This time I will remember the pain of relapse. This time I will be fully in, holding nothing back. Not even the things which will cost me everything.
I will leave behind social media. I will leave behind my tv shows. I will leave behind my safety nets. I will leave behind my growing apathy.