Two parts stuck out to me:
1) Working recovery with others: surrounding myself with those who share common values and goals are important towards my recovery. Not everyone shares the same opinion on sexual behaviors. Some - including health professionals or family - describe it to be healthy or normal. Whom I surround myself with can have an influence on me. Working with men who have found tools to work through life in a healthy way, and which aligns with my faith and values are important to me. They are friends, and resources for my personal growth. They can also relate to and understand what betrayal trauma means, which helps me learn how to keep my wife and family safe.
2) We stop relishing the language of lust, resentment, and rage. This stands out to me since I can relate, and what I'm seeking recovery from. I look forward to learning and gaining emotional sobriety.
As I mentioned above, it is essential to me, since it is a fellowship sharing common beliefs and goals. Additionally, they are friends and resources to learn from, and reach out to in times of need. Whom I reach out to during those vulnerable moments (difficult emotions) can make all the difference to me.
Thusfar, I reach out to my sponsor, and some others from group. I also do weekly checkins with my wife.
- I will not view pornographic images or videos.
- I will not view exercise videos with female instructors.
- No aimless internet browsing, or searching for terms which I know lead to provocative or highly triggering images.
- I will not use chatrooms to communicate with female strangers
- No flirting with females (wife being exception)
- I will not entertain lustful thoughts/fantasy
- I will use YouTube and social media for faith, work, or educational purposes only
I am powerless over many things in my life. For example, pain I may encounter, behaviors of others, and the consequences/wounds my behaviors have created to my marriage and family. As much as I may want certain things to be different, I have no control over it. Accepting that is the first part, to recognizing my powerlessness. Turning to God for inspiration on the next right step, is my surrender over what I cannot control. Turning to God, taking the next right step, and being patient, are ways which I start to trust God.
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test for Monthly
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test!!
